Does someone have a magic pill or something that will make my cat all better? Because I’m getting really tired of worrying and seeing her in pain, and I’d really like to be able to stop crying and get some sleep tonight.

No, the talk with the vet did not go well today.

No, it looks like we need to prepare for the worst.

No, she’s not getting better.

No, I don’t want to talk about it. I don’t want sympathy. I don’t want to hear about how “it’s the right thing to do”, because, dammit, I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to hear about how I’ll see her again someday, because I don’t believe that little piece of fiction, and anyone who knows anything about me at all just knows that sort of talk will just piss me off.

I just want her to be better.  But that?  Ain’t gonna happen.  All this modern medicine, and there’s nothing they can do.

Once upon a time, there was a patch of grass. My dad and I put a deck-board border around the patch of grass, bricked off a section for yummy composting, and covered it with leaves, grass clippings, straw, and horse manure.

And then it snowed.

In the spring, I added more grass clippings. And straw. And then I planted. Tomatoes, brussels sprouts, pumpkins, cucumbers, peppers, leeks, carrots, beans, peas, beets. The tomatoes, brussels sprouts, peppers, pumpkins, cucumbers, and leeks were all started earlier in a greenhouse in the spring – and all but the peppers and cucumbers survived. The carrots, beans, peas, and beets were from seed, and none of them grew. I also stuck a couple of wrinkled, shriveled potatoes in the ground.

But enough of that.

The tomatoes thrived. For some reason, I can grow tomatoes, and I don’t do anything to them. I’ve got a bazillion little orange tomatoes and a gajillion plum tomatoes, and no idea what to do with them – there’s only so many pizzas you can eat!

I pulled out my pitchfork, and found that the six or seven potatoes I plopped into the dirt had, indeed, multiplied.  And this?  Is only from three of the plants.

And the three pumpkin plants that had gone into the ground? Only one of them made it, but that’s all that needed to, and now I’ve got this.

My very own pumpkin!

I am so easily amused…